Charisma & Confidence at Christmas

How would you rate your levels of confidence and charisma in the run up to Christmas? Research tells us more than 70% of people feel nervous when attending the Christmas party, and 90% are overawed by the impending family get-together.

My five top tips are designed to raise your charisma and confidence and get you ready for the perfect party this Yuletide. By following these simple steps you’ll feel more confident at the party or family get-together, and positively glow with charisma!

1. Choose Beliefs That Support You

What do you believe about Christmas get-togethers? I want you to list all the beliefs you have about Christmas. Don’t try to censor yourself; just let them roll out. Spend as long as you need on this step.

Now, look back at those beliefs and separate the positive beliefs from the negative beliefs.

For the negative beliefs ask yourself what evidence there is. Was it something that happened years ago, or a more recent event? Whatever, decide now to move on and replace it with a new, more empowering belief.

Remember, you are creating this new belief with confidence and clarity. So, make it wonderful. You choose who you are, how you feel, and who you want to be for the future.

Once you have that new belief, build up evidence to prove to yourself it’s a true belief.

1.      Look for occasions where having this new belief will bring about an even better result – and congratulate you each time this happens.

2.      Make a list of all the evidence (real and imagined) of where this new belief helps and supports you, past/present/future!

2. Look Sensational 

Presentation is paramount. Looking sensational should be seen as a prerequisite of life in general, and it’s even more important at Christmastime. To look fabulous is absolutely needed, and the mistake most of us make is the belief that we only need look good for other people, when we’re out, or when we’re ‘on show’ at some event. Not so.

The first person you should be looking your best for is you.

With that in mind, take a good look at you. Does anything need changing - a new dress or shirt perhaps? Dry cleaning should be done in good time so as to relieve any undue pressure at finding a smelly, creased garment in the back of the wardrobe on the day of the party. Do your shoes look shiny? Be honest with yourself.

In the UK television fashion guru Gok Wan is famed for hit Channel 4 show ‘How to Look Good Naked’. The programme focuses on style and styling, health, confidence and self esteem in a light and informative way. Click on the link here to discover a wealth of information, hints and tips from Gok and the show.

You know you owe it to yourself.

3. Rehearse Fabulousness

What’s good for superstars, successful athletes, businessmen, and World leaders is good enough for you. What do they have in common? They rehearse whatever it is that is scheduled to happen in their mind first. Even more; they rehearse their best case scenario – the successful outcome they want.

30 minutes twice a day, run your successful party or get-together in your head. Who will you talk to? What subject will you talk about? See yourself laughing and exuding confidence. What will you be wearing, drinking, how will your hair be? Are you going to pamper yourself with a half-day spa beforehand, maybe inviting a few friends along? Will you dance at the party? If so, what kind of music will play? How sexy will you look?

The secret is to rehearse by running your own mental movie

Remember, you’re the director of your own movie, so make it a classic. Do it. Believe it. Make your party wonderful, make your evening fabulous, and make sure you are the star of the show. Copy the Stars, and win your very own Oscar!

4. Small Talk

There’s an old coaching phrase suggesting that by not planning to succeed, we actually plan to fail. Whether or not that is true, a little prior planning before any event goes a long way to ensuring success, especially when talking about small talk at parties.

List all your favourite subjects, things you’re interested in. they could include anything, such as current events, politics, alternative health, pop music, sport, women in the media? Realise you know a lot, that you have a wide range of interests, and celebrate it. If you feel you need to expand a little more then read through your favourite magazine or newspaper; taking on an extra perspective.

Then chat with those you come into contact with from now on. What you are doing is rehearsing small talk. Chatter at parties is no different than at the bus stop, in the supermarket, having a drink, or with the person on the next machine at your local gym. It is the same. Remember, the other person is human too, in fact they’re probably thinking ‘wow, I wish I was as good at small talk as they are’ – and they mean YOU!!

5. Have Fun!

The Christmas party, date, gathering, or whatever is supposed to be FUN. Remember that. Relax and enjoy what should be one of the best times of the year. There will never be a better time when everyone will be on the same wavelength.

Who knows, the fun you have now could become infectious and you’ll want to carry it on throughout the year. Imagine; a party in the future, accepting the invitation, knowing you’ll have a fabulous time and look a million dollars into the bargain.

Christmas is a time for sharing, so share the fabulous and charismatic you with everyone. Confidence is infectious. Believe me, you’ll be the star of the show!

Have a fabulous Christmas. Enjoy yourself. Keep in touch and tell me how you get on.

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